Raise your hand if you’ve ever been in the following situation. You are in your office working, with the door closed. Suddenly, someone knocks on your door. You answer it to a student who has dropped by to discuss their grade. You remind the student that they don’t have an appointment, to which they reply, “well I figured I’d stop by since I was already meeting with Professor so and so down the hall.” You give in and discuss their grade with them… for twenty minutes. After all, you don’t want to be rude. By the time your conversation is over you’ve been sufficiently distracted from your writing, and your hopes for a productive writing session are gone.

There are strong expectations for faculty to be available for students and fellow faculty. Some departments frown on faculty working behind closed doors, and many require a set number of office hours weekly. In addition to these implicit and explicit rules, you put pressure on yourself to consistently make small talk, meet with students at their convenience with little regard for your own schedule, and entertain your colleagues’ requests for informal meetings and conversations. Much of this is done so that you’re seen as polite, or as a team player.

Very few people want to be seen as the curmudgeon who never engages in chit chat and hides away in their office all the time. Reputation matters in the workplace, and you certainly want to be liked. There is a middle ground, however, between hiding away and being the person who is always available. Unfortunately, what tends to be the case is that you become so fearful of disappointing someone (especially if you are a junior faculty member), that you overcompensate, and make yourself constantly accessible in the name of caution.

The middle ground I mention above includes being judicious about when you say no. For instance, imagine if you had told the student, “I don’t have time for a meeting right now. Let’s schedule for another time,” and returned to your writing. You would have eliminated the disruption to your writing time and had a productive writing session. Would rescheduling be rude or selfish? You’re not skipping out on a meeting, making a student wait unnecessarily, or shutting down all opportunities for the student to discuss their grade.

I would be interested to know: would telling a student you didn’t have time for a meeting be frowned upon at your institution? Do you work at a place where the expectation is, either subtle or overt, that you make yourself completely available for students whenever you’re in your office?